Reflecting on the past........

Today is Saturday, November 10th, what makes this day special? Well everyday we wake up and are given another day is special. I think today was a special day to my mother 43 years ago, she had a baby girl. When I look back on my life at this point in time, I think about all the joy and blessing God has bestow on me. Yes there have been so many blessing in my life. More than one person could ever hope for. My blessing are the things that are irreplaceable to me. My Family, Friends, my Church, God's forgiveness and love. But right now I want what I can't have, to have the love of my family who is not here. I know I have their love here with me in my heart, but what I would give to have one more day with my loved ones.

To see my dad today! My dad passed away when I was 11 years old, it has left a void in my life. I would be so proud for him to see my children, my wonderful husband, and I would love to have him give me a hug and feel his love around me. My grandmother, oh how I would love to hear one of her stories of her childhood while sharing a double cola and Cheetos. She had a way of making you feel the most important in her life. My sweet Aunt Faye, mothers sister, my second mom. She added so much to my life. I truly never imagined her not being here. I would love to hear her boisterous voice and listen to her tell me to never let my wonderful husband feel unloved. Her love could light up a room. I miss her telling me " I loved you more.....". Spending one day of clarity with my mother would be such a joy. To see her happy and excited about my children and my life. Every year she loses more of her memory and our roles are and have been reversing. Having her in the same State would be a gift too.

Today is a happy day, I must look to what God has given me. I must embrace these extraordinary gifts that are irreplaceable....I have a wonderful man to share joy and happiness and even the sorrow with, thank you Richard. I have two amazing children, Brittney and Ethan, I am forever thankful to God for this gift of being their mother. I have a second dad, Mr. Boyd, my dear Father In Law, he is everything I need in a father, his guidance is so powerful in my life. My sweet Mother In Law is the mother I ache for, she is also a pretty good buddy, whether shopping, eating, or playing games she gives me motherly love and I am so grateful for the void she fills for me. My sister lives in Ft. Wayne IND. so Sherri has to fill dual roles for me, Sister In Law , and sister. I love this young woman and hope she knows what she brings to my life. I am also blessed with a wonderful bother In Law who is the closes thing to a brother, mine is living in Alabama, I miss him so..... I have lost and I have gained in my life. It truly amazes me to see God return what I so desperately need. Thank you God for knowing my heart, and knowing exactly what I needed and who could fill those needs. Yes, today is my birthday, time to reflect on this past year, I have grown so much, I have also regressed at times. I have been happy, sad, joyful, sorrowful, and so many things in between....but I am so glad to be....to be here....to be able to live a life with those I love and give back a small portion of my blessing to others. I am blessed beyond measure and today I realize that God has a plan for me...I hope I am that boisterous laughing Aunt to my sweet little nephews and nieces. I pray to one day be that story telling Grandmother to my grand- babies. I want to be a great Mother in Law, and hopefully in the next 43 years, God willing, I will look back and be as happy or content as I am today!!!! Thank you friends. Your friendship is part of my blessings.....I have a day to be thankful and rejoice and celebrate.....May I do this with grace dignity and a grateful heart.....God bless and thanks for the walk down memory lane.....